Posted in 50 in 50 days, Missions of LIFE

Well with my soul- 40 days to 50

The funeral from Friday,  talk has prompted more death talk. I am going to die someday, we all are. And as mentioned before odd’s are I have less time to live than the 50 years I have lived.  Probably somewhere between 20 and 30  years. There is a possibility I get another 40 years out of this body, IF I lose this last 30 lbs, and I don’t kill myself trying to.

Of course there are the unforseen’s that could let me leave this world and enter God’s sooner. 2 Corinthians 5:8 8 Yes, we are of good courage, and we would rather be away from the body and at home with the Lord. Bread trucks, cancer and such. If I have a choice, and I think, I do, there are a few ways don’t want to die.

I don’t want to die choking on food. To die because I put yet one more thing in my mouth I didn’t need and not even chew it correctly, would be a total fail on my part.

I don’t want to drown, at sea especially. I can’t think of any reason to be in the ocean other than a cruise or pleasure boating. An indulgence being the ‘cause’ of my death is just wrong. Also having been a lifeguard, it is insulting.

Drunk driver or stupid driver not paying attention, I don’t want to die because someone was too stupid to pull their head out. I don’t want to be the stupid driver either. I would hate for the last thought I had to be, “Damn’ that was stupid Chris”.

A random bullet from what we call ‘Little Mexico’. Which is within shooting distance of our home. A bullet has already ‘randomely’ come through the ceiling of MY closet, from those that reside there :(. If I die because of  the law not doing their job and taking care illegal activity, that I would be prosecuted for, I would be really ticked off.

Really, dying from something that could have been prevented, would just piss me off. Preventable, in that, someone somewhere could have made a better choice, me and others. Deliberate sins, mistakes, bad decisions.

God knows all, created all, and does allow or disallow, what ever He wills. We don’t understand, can’t understand the beginning and end and all the way throughness of God. He does not plan the future, he knows the future,he is beyond the future. God knows every future that can be, He hopes for our sake our future is the future without the sins, mistakes and bad decisions. He knows the future with just a few bumps in the road, and the future with a whole mountain of ‘explicit’, and the future that has not even a ripple in the path.

I know a lot of people say ‘It was God’s will’ or “God is in control” or ‘It is all in God’s plan’, when someone dies of ‘something’ . I say yes and no to that.  God does not will any one to die. God’s will is that we live to the full purpose he has planned for us. God does not plan for the drunk driver become drunk, to decide to drive, to kill. God does not make me pick up my phone and start reading a text while I drive.

God did not knock Kirk down in his driveway.   God did not manipulate the chromosomes of Evan to cause his craniofacial deformity. God did not cause the anesthesiologist to be ignorant of airways on Pierre Robin babies. God did not cause my bio parents to have premarital sex. God does not lead a woman to abort a child. God did not cause Herod to kill all baby boys. God does not cause cancer cells to grow. God did not genetically alter wheat so man can not digest it. God does not make an alcoholic drink.  God did not tell Eve to disobey. God knows it will be happening and to whom. God does use each and every stupid, evil thing we do, at the leading of our earthly parent, Satan, for His purpose. Whether we know it or not.

God did not create sin. God did not create disobedience. God does not control sin. God does not control disobedience. He tells us to.  We all die physical and spiritual death because of sin. We have illness, genetic flaws, cancer, accidents, because of disobedience. Maybe it is not our direct disobedience, it is ‘man’ disobedience, hundreds of years of man interfering with God’s perfect creation.

God’s plan is for man to live a long productive life for Him.

At first Man lived, forever, Adam 930 years, Noah 950  .Then God decided to change things up (He can do that you know)  Genesis 6:3 Then the Lord said, “My Spirit will not contend with humans forever, for they are mortal; their days will be a hundred and twenty years.”    So man’s life span started to dwindle, Abraham 175,  Isaac 180, Moses 120.


Our purpose is to be productiveGenesis 9:7As for you, be fruitful and increase in number; multiply on the earth and increase upon it.”  

Ephesians 2:10 10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them

Matthew 28:19–20 19 Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.

Deuteronomy 6:5 You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength.

Guess who does not want for ‘us’ to do our purpose?  1 Peter 5:8  Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.

None are ‘purposed’ to die young, we are missioned to go out and do God’s work, to bring more and more of his lost back to him, if we die physical death young, that is the world ‘taking’ us out, not God.   Revelation 21:4 And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.”  But it will be.

I used to pray the childhood prayer of ” Now I lay me down to sleep pray the Lord my soul to keep. If I should die before I wake I pray the Lord my soul to take.” I frightened me, the thought of waking up dead. Now I am not at all afraid of death, I know it is not an end, it is continuation.  But I will be pissed of if the world( whether it be me or thee) takes me out, before God, and He will be to!



Aspiring to be the Christian Gluten Free Queen of the World. I love writing/blogging, painting, decorating, grand mothering, cooking, helping others BE gluten free, old movies, family, God, animals, my kids, my grandkids, my husband, talking about adoption. I know about painting murals, cooking gluten free, being a mother in law, special needs, cleft palates, Pierre Robin, Celiac, marriage, faith, God, sons, dogs, cats, gardening, a little bit of horses, building a house and living life blessed.

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