Posted in Exhort Pray Praise..., Rants Raves


I am being convicted, by God. He does that often, usually it is a string of circumstances, life experiences, mine and others, sermons, lessons I am doing, TV shows, movies, and some stress or tension is usually involved. By itself none mean much but put it all together, God is teaching me sumthin.

  • I started the Beth Moore Daniel study, got a great price on it at a gun show I went to with Keith.  The theme, thus far, is integrity, standing for what you believe in, not succumbing to the world.
  • I just finished Ephesians study, on this blog, most of my concentration went into the whole armor of God, standing firm, the only way to be victorious is with God.
  • I read Life Lesson ? and answer in Real Simple magazine,  Is it ever appropriate to spill a friends secret?  The answer was no EXCEPT when the secret involves a major ethical breech or could harm someone.
  • I started attending an exercise program with a group of women in my church, it is intense (for me). I have to make myself go and do it.  It is a great workout, I thought I was doing well on my own walking everyday. I am disappointed in myself for not working harder prior to this. I am frustrated that since starting this I have actually gained weight, (I am NOT eating more!!) Not getting instant results is making me very frustrated which makes me feel very shallow and weak.   I want to quit.
  • I adopted a new way of eating months ago, and it was working, I was doing exercise with it.  I lost about 20 lbs. Holidays and cold weather and whatever caused me to lose focus,and gain 10 lbs. At the beginning of all of this get down to business and lose I realized I was not depending on God, but the quick fix of a pill, or starvation or…I blamed my fat on pituitary, thyroid hormones.  I prayed and repented of not trusting that He alone is my strength. I know that is where my strength and perseverance and loss came from. Then I forgot. I have let other ideas, the want for quick fix come in, when the weight came back.  I stopped eating correctly, skip meals, complain about my afternoon snacks, punishing myself for slipping up.
  • My Sunday School lessons are all focused on the sins of man and plan of God to redeem – It spans from creation to resurrection.  We have been in the escaping Egypt and in the desert for the past several weeks, finally reaching the promised land, only to have the doubters bring on 40 more years of misery. I have taught this curriculum for years, and each year I glean more.  This year I am struck by:
  1.  Moses arguing with God that he should not be the one that does the leading, so God adds Aaron
  2. Aaron’s sons just tweaking worship a bit and ‘getting’ killed by God.
  3. God’s tough love BECAUSE the people keep wanting the worldly comforts instead of HIS promised land.- Poiseness snakes
  4. Moses never reaching the promised land because he let his anger override his obedience to God.
  5. Caleb and Joshua standing and speaking up, opposing the world, believing in the promises of God. Not going with the crowd.
  6. Caleb and Joshua being the only ones, in their generation to enter Canaan.
  7. Caleb and Joshua still having to endure 40 years in wilderness, because of the lack of faith of the others. Or lack of integrity of others. And accepting it, with integrity.
  8. God’s follow through- He tells what He wants, what He expects and what will happen if we do not agree. He promises consequences for us, good and bad, the rest is up to us to abide or not. God does not change, ever. That is integrity, that is love.
  • A blog post of a fellow blogger Chief of the Least of a YouTube of Penn being impressed  by a Christian with integrity.
  • Witnessing those in positions of leadership not showing integrity. How very disappointing it is to see someone you trust to protect and teach and be truthful not doing so. To watch leaders lie and omit truths all in order to protect another’s lies and mistakes.
  • Watched the movie “Seven Days in Utopia.”  It is about believing in what you do. Believing in God’s power. Acting on that belief even when the world thinks your crazy. NOT CONFORMING. Integrity.
  • I telling a friend of a wrong they were doing, knowing full well they would be angry with me, willing to accept the rejection ( I HATE REJECTION), they rejecting me and my surviving it. And then they thanking me for being honest and apologizing.

My lesson is: Integrity is standing firm, standing up for truth. Integrity is pushing myself into an unnatural uncomfortable position. Integrity is righteous. Integrity is respected. I must work to have integrity and to keep it. Integrity is knowing when I am wrong and admitting it. Integrity is knowing when I am right and standing for it. Integrity does not hide. Integrity does not lie. Integrity does not fear. Integrity does not run away.

I do not show integrity always. I worry on the rejection of man far too much, though I am growing out of that more everyday.  Am I now trying to win the approval of men or of God?…….If I were still trying to please men,  I would not be a servant of Christ.  Gal 1:10    I let my anger, my fear direct me instead of God, at times. I let others convince me that I am not acceptable if I do not conform to the world.   Romans 12:2
And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.

I see these times of conviction as God refining me.  Preparing me today, for eternity.

He will sit as a refiner and a purifier of silver;
He will purify the sons of Levi,
And purge them as gold and silver,
That they may offer to the Lord
An offering in righteousness.  Malichi 3:3



Aspiring to be the Christian Gluten Free Queen of the World. I love writing/blogging, painting, decorating, grand mothering, cooking, helping others BE gluten free, old movies, family, God, animals, my kids, my grandkids, my husband, talking about adoption. I know about painting murals, cooking gluten free, being a mother in law, special needs, cleft palates, Pierre Robin, Celiac, marriage, faith, God, sons, dogs, cats, gardening, a little bit of horses, building a house and living life blessed.

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