Posted in Exhort Pray Praise..., Rants Raves

When Do We Compromise?

This heresy is still going on– Satan started it, with ” Nope, God did not mean really die” And now these false prophets continue it. This blog was written in 2008. I have just become aware of this heresy in 2012, that leaders in churches are being turned. And running the sheep off of a cliff!
Beware of wolves in sheeps clothing!!

Notes From A Retired Preacher

When do we compromise our faith, our beliefs, our principles, our morals?

There are organizations and people, leaders and Pastors who are trying to undermine our fundamental Bible faith.

Compromise and acceptance of error is not new. It has been around for thousands of years– in fact since the beginning and has continued until today.

God told Adam and Eve,

“But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof .” Genesis 2:17

And in direct contradiction to what God commanded, Satan (the Old Serpent) told Eve,

“And the serpent said unto the woman, :” Genesis 3:4

The Nation of Israel rebelled against God’s commands to Moses and compromised by building their special idols.

Paul wrote letters to the Corinthian Church, the Galatian church and many other churches to warn against doctrinal and moral compromise…

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Posted in Ephesians

Ephesians 6:17 Sword of the Spirit

17 Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.Take the Sword of the spirit. The spirit has a sword. And it is the word of God, the God Breathed Bible.  Out of all the pieces of armor,the only weapon is the Word of God. The shield, the armor protects, it defends, but the sword is used in a defensive and an offensive way, to attack, to cut, possibly to annihilate , to defend and stop one from attacking. We are to take up the Word of God and use it to defend, to protect, to wield off evil. 

 

To use a sword you must know how. You need to know your sword, know the weight of it in your hand, be able to use it. The sword must be polished, and sharpened, the edges not marred nor changed. If the metal breaks or rusts away it is ruined. We must know Gods Word, hear it, study it. We must take care to not allow His word to become distorted in our hands.  

 

With out a weapon all we can do is just stand, in our armor. Yes, we can raise our shield, our faith, but we can not stop the attacks. We can stop the attack with God’s word, our sword. We could pierce the heart of an unbeliever with God’s word, and they too could take on their armor. 

It is interesting, too, that we do not need other weapons. God’s Word is enough.  Also the weapon we are to take on is one that is used in close combat. Not one we shoot away from us, like and arrow. A sword is used in close combat, the trial is felt up close and personal. 

 

What is the substance of our sword? 

Hebrews 4:12 the word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.– Living Powerful, Discerner,sharper than two-edged sword. God

Psalm 119:105 Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path  Lamp, it illuminates, shows THE WAY

John 17:17 Sanctify them by Your truth. Your word is truth.   Truth

John 1:14 The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.  Jesus

I think about a knight fighting, holding the shield up, blocking the blows of incoming evil as he swings the sword. The skill used with a sword, standing firm, jabbing into unprotected areas of the opponent. A sword is not just used to deflect, like the shield, it is used to conquer. A soldier does not just knock the opponent down. The warrior does not use the sword to scratch the skin. The sword is used to stop the enemy, in his tracks, so he can not attack again. God’s word can destroy the enemy.

Posted in Ephesians

Ephesians 6:17 Helmet of Salvation

17 Take the helmet of salvation

A blow to the head can kill. You do not even have to draw blood, penetrate the bone, a hit on the head can cause an internal bleed and your brain is crushed by the pressure and you die.  Many head injuries you do not die instantly, the blood leaks in and slowly kills the brain.  Many head injuries , the body dies after the brain dies.  

My brother, Kirk, had vertigo.One day after a long day of construction work, he came home very dizzy, and he passed out and fell in his drive way.  Kirk was 6’3” . The full force of that tall frame coming straight back and hitting the concrete fractured his skull, and caused his brain to ‘bounce’ forward, his brain was bleeding from the back and the front.  Kirk’s brain began to swell. Within 36 hours there were no longer any brain waves, his brain had died, yet his body had not. When the machines that caused his heart to beat, and his breath to flow were turned off, his body no longer functioned.  Physical Kirk died at 32. Spiritual Kirk continues on, eternally.  

During the 36 hours Kirk seemed alive, his heart beat, his lungs took in air. I held his hand, I talked to him, his body was there. I wanted him to be alive, so he was. The doctors ran tests and found no blood was moving through his brain, that there were no brain waves. Though he seemed alive he was dead.  

Had Kirk been wearing a helmet, as any 32 year old male would do as everyday attire 😉 , he would be alive today, physically. We have our children wear helmets as they bicycle. Helmets are used by  skiers now, because the bump on the head on the slopes have killed many. Helmets save us from death. 

The helmet of salvation saves us from eternal death. Remember dear old Satan in the garden? The lie he spoke to Eve4 Then the serpent said to the woman, “You will not surely die. Adam and Eve did not die immediately from eating the fruit,. But they did begin the ‘bleed’. The relationship between their source of life, eternal life, God was cut off. Their God brains died. Though they had living bodies they were spiritually dead, their bodies begin to deteriorate, and die, eventually they will return to the dust they came from. And their spirits would continue on, in Death, separation from God. Death is separation from life, and it too is eternal.

With the helmet of salvation, our bleed is healed. Our relationship with our God is renewed. We have eternal life, instead of eternal death. The helmet of salvation gives us eternal spiritual life.

Romans 5:10 For if when we were enemies we were reconciled to God through the death of His Son, much more, having been reconciled, we shall be saved by His life. 11 And not only that, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received the reconciliation.12 Therefore, just as through one man sin entered the world, and death through sin, and thus death spread to all men, because all sinned

More in a week…. I would love any input…

Posted in Adoption, My Adoption Story

Adoption Story 6- Purpose

Purpose.

I was not an immaculate conception. L had a little help, getting pregnant. We will call him D. From the little L told me there was nothing extraordinary about their relationship, except maybe he was a bit more intense about it than she. Once I was conceived, L realized that under the circumstances, spending the rest of their lives together as Mr. and Mrs. would not be good for anyone involved. A mistake was made with the sex, no need to perpetuate it.

D wanted to get married and have a family. Yet wanting something does not make it right.

Before I continue I want to explain,I want to be very respectful of D and his family. I love them and care for them. I don’t know if I actually have the ‘right’ to open the closets the skeletons are kept in. I don’t think I should, completely, I will give you a peek. I believe I do need to share ‘the story’, to honor, to acknowledge the life of a young man who loved a baby he never knew, D.

For D,there was strife and turmoil, behind a white picket fence facade. An overbearing father, a mother who chose to be a victim of this. Possibly her desperation to hide the ugly from everyone on the outside and keep that picket fence painted  was even more damaging than the harshness of the father.

The father (my grandfather) was never told about the pregnancy. For fear of his reaction, D and his mother decided to never tell him.  L describes meetings with her parents, D and his mother, trying to work things out. D wanted to marry. L knew it would not work. D wanted to raise the baby on his own. They all knew it would not work.  He could not even tell his father. D’s mother did not want D’s father to know. All of this was a terrible blow to D. D and L’s relationship dissolved. D became angry. L had to remove herself from the situation and moved to the adoption home.

Almost a year and a half after I was born and given to my family, a tragedy of life happened. One of the renditions goes something like this;  D was brought  home drunk,by his mother. From what the newspaper article says, and what the siblings of D know, and adding what L remembered of D, he had been troubled, he was distraught over something only he and his mother knew of. He had been acting out for months. Another argument ensued, the gun his mother had carried with her for protection as she went to find her son that night, was out. D made statements about not having anything to live for, everything he loved was taken away. A struggle between a mother and son, the father watched. A shot, through the heart, and 17 year old D is dead. Tragic.

For my Aunt and Uncle, D’s siblings, this was just the beginning of tragic events. Their parents divorced. Within a year of the shooting their mother was killed in a car accident. Now no one in their family knew of me.  A year after their mothers death their father died from a virus he contracted on vacation in Mexico. By the time Uncle was a high school graduate and Aunt was a freshman in high school, they had lost all family except each other.  As circumstances had it, they were ‘brought in’ by opposite family, Uncle fraternal family and Aunt maternal. Fraternal and maternal had burned bridges with D’s death.

When I met L she told me of D, their relationship, his name and family, and his death. L suggested I not pursue the family. His being dead and his family not knowing of me, it made sense.  I agreed. For a time. About two years after finding L, God started pulling at my heart again.  I felt a need, to find them.  My thought was just to get some medical history. God wanted me to find them for another reason. I know God wanted this to be done, it was so easy to find them, I do not even remember how I did it.  L had given me the family names, same thing I had to work with before, within an hour I had the name and number of my now married Aunt.

I called a couple of times not getting an answer, maybe an answering machine.  Finally Aunt answered. By this time and the circumstances being different, D being dead, Aunt not having the shame to bear, I was not as ‘careful’ about my announcing whom I was. I said “ I am Christy Petty, and I am D’s illigitimate daughter.” Aunt did not even need to ask, she said “ You must be L’s.”  I confirmed and Aunt explained she had had no idea about me but it made sense. Finding out about me helped explain a lot of the turmoil her brother had gone through. One thing she said at the end of the conversation was “ You are the light the end of a dark tunnel.”  I did not know what that meant, until I heard of the estranged relation she and Uncle and the family had had all the years past.  Until I realized the plan God had.

Within months of finding Aunt, we met. She gave me a baby book of my D’s. Pictures of him. He was so young. They found that my cousin W actually does look like a family member, me.  They met all of my boys, and refer to them as nephews and my sons call them Aunt and Uncle.

Since then we have had a  Thanksgiving at my home with my parents, Aunt and Uncle, their spouses and children. Mom and Dad loved them, they became their family too.  We went to the beach with Aunt and Uncle, met some maternal great-aunt and uncles. Had a fraternal family reunion. Some fences have been mended, some bridges rebuilt. God had a plan.

I have come to realize that God does not cause the turmoil, the heartache the shame and grief in our lives. We bring it. Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. God has thoughts of peace and all good for us. It is our choices, that bring it on.  Our choices affect the world, sometimes a little sometimes a lot.  God knows our future, though he does not make it. This is a saying God gave me years ago, after the death of my brother, God does not cause these things on purpose, but he makes a purpose for all things.  I have a purpose. God knows.

Posted in Ephesians

Ephesians 6:16 Shield of Faith

Ephesians 16 above all, taking the shield of faith with    we must actively use our faith.  An actual shield does nothing, even if it is the biggest and the strongest, unless it is picked up and held up as a barrier to the blows. James 2:17 Thus also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead.    Faith needs a whole study of it’s own. Faith is something to be had, something to exercised, it is belief. Hebrews 11:1 Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. Faith is  our first line of defense: we have the rest of the armor, but we weaken the blows, deflect some completely with the shield. We guard the against the onslaught of attack.  The body can take so many blows, even if it is protected. Matthew 14:31  Peter believed in Jesus, he walked on water, yet when he let doubt in, he sank. Doubt came past his little faith shield. Faith did not change the Truth, did not remove the righteousness, but the lack of sank the man, in the armor.  Faith gives us the power to move forward to push against evil. The doubt the worry, the fear hits us when we let our faith down., when we stop believing that God does work all for our Good, when we listen to man and the hopelessness of the world Matthew 17:20. ………which you will be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked one. With my faith, I am able. To stop ALL the attacks from Satan. Satan is attacking.

The main thought I have, I MUST take up my shield, I must take the action. God does not do it for me. He does not make me use my faith. My action matters a great deal.  Any thoughts of yours?

The Helmet of Salvation is next.  Without Salvation from Death, we have no reason to live. 

 

Posted in Adoption, My Adoption Story

Adoption Story 5-We Meet

I don’t think there was anything extraordinary in the way I presented myself to the social worker that she allowed me information to find my bio family. My knowing where to look, in the library, how to put the trail together, was not my brilliance.  The words, the complete sentences, without blubbering,I spoke, first, to my biological mother, were not my own.  My fearless leaps were not from the unsure heart that beat wildly in my throat.The unbridled joy, bio mother and family,felt at the return of me in her life, was not generated on their own.  The extraordinary, the brilliance, the courage, the joy all were God. This desire, the search, the find, the response, all answered prayers, answered before I prayed, answered before I was born, answered before L realized the heartbreak she carried within her. I knew then and even more now, God is the why of everything good and right. My hopes and joys exist because of Him.

I asked Keith what he remembered of my meeting, face to face, with L, 24 years ago. His recollection is of totally different events than mine. Both are limited. Not only time has robbed me of many memories, but also the fear, the nerves from that first meeting turned much into fog.  We had several conversations before meeting, I remember more of those.  For me the actual meeting, was a whirl of questions, thoughts, impressions, fear, joy.  I was looking at her, a total stranger, yet blood of my blood.  I was listening to every word from her, yet not hearing content only sound. Wondering if she liked me? If she was just being polite, but truly just wanted me to leave? If she liked me more before she actually saw me? If she thought I was fat ?(I wish I was that fat now 😉 ) Had she cried for joy, sadness, or regret over me, ever? Would she would want to know me? Would we become family? Did she think my children were gorgeous? Did she want to claim them as grandchildren? How do I explain to them the difference between she and their ‘real grandparents’ my parents?  Why did she have to live across the state? I wondered if this was the right woman. Why did she keep looking at Keith?

When planning to meet L, I did not want to make the trip just about me meeting her, I hated putting the family out for me. I could have flown by myself, but that would have been awkward, the whole purpose being me meeting her, she seeing me. Not to mention the expense of me getting there and leaving all my loved ones at home eating bologna.  If we all went, she gets to meet  the boys, Keith, my everything. I get to meet her, as if she is   someone from the past I am catching up with. Which she actually was.  We were just dropping by on the way to somewhere else, so time constraints get us back on the road.(a reason to run away if need)  We would stay in hotels, do some fun on the way, make it a vacation. We traveled miles and miles and miles with 3 and 5 year old boys. We were on a vacation, the lower middle class kind where you go and blow money on Holiday Inn and be proud because it is not Motel 6, and eat cheap fast food.We are not big ‘savers’, we probably were going on tax return money and my parents gas cards, to pay back later. The stop to meet the bio family was put in the middle of Six Flags and visiting an old friend of Keith’s who lived in Arkansas.  I am a practical traveler, I want to get all the worth of my time and money, if a relative lives in a town, we must visit.  Keith is not a practical traveler. Keith HATES to visit family in a town if the goal is vacation. He thinks if we have doctors appointments or business in town it is NOT the time to visit others or vacation. He is the ultimate one track mind.

I wore my favorite skirt, high waisted, v front panel, khaki, buttoned with brass buttons up the front. A peach knit shirt, with tiny rose buds on it, like the pattern on my baby blanket, Mom saved for me. This was the year of the perm, so my hair was CURLY shoulder length, and still naturally blond. I felt fat. That skirt, though, would not reach around my waist today, even if I sucked in. My boys, gorgeous, cute and adorable. Their golden blond hair in bowl cuts, they almost looked like twins. Keith tall dark and ever so handsome, my rock. I remember knocking on the door of the cute little house, a home L moved in to from her lifetime home town. I looked down at the boys and up at Keith, knowing my blessings. I looked up as the door opened and into the eyes of the woman who gave me birth. I recognized her from her picture, she was much prettier though. I thought, ‘She does not photograph well, either’. Her mother was standing behind her waiting expectantly. We walked in and a mother I do not know and I attempted to hug, awkwardly. Grandmother, I did not know grabbed my hand pulled me toward her and gave me a hug, I felt my grandmother, Mamaw and my caretaker for my first 5 years, Mamie, wrap their arms around me, I stepped back and looked into tear filled eyes of peace and love.

My bio grandmother died a year after I met her, from the ovarian cancer. Years later, I was attending my sisters wedding ,a sister in law of my bio grandmother told me what peace it had brought Bio Grandmother to have met me. She said Bio Grandmother had worried and prayed for me always. Bio Grandmother had considered keeping me and raising me, but knew that would be hard for L. But she still regretted and worried. The aunt thought that having known I was safe is what allowed bio grandmother to have peace from that the last year of cancer. I thank God I listened when he called.

Introductions of boys and Keith were made as we stood in the doorway. The oddest thing to me was their attention to Keith. I wanted more to me, to the boys, I wanted for them to see family members in my boys faces, and they would not quit peering at Keith, who was no relation to them. Keith is attractive, but seriously, not all that, and these are older women, and this was about ME not him. They went to the kitchen together to get drinks for us as we settled in the living room, I felt they were talking of us, impressions etc, or course they would. When they returned L asked a bit about Keith and where he was from. I then thought, maybe this is the wrong person, maybe she had a son instead of a daughter. Or maybe Keith looks like some other family member  of theirs and I am married to a cousin or something. It was odd. Then L began to explain her curiosity, attentions to Keith, she said that he looked amazingly similar to my biological father. What she remembered of him, 24 years ago. Bio Grandmother agreed.   Wow!

 

I met 2 of my three half siblings. The oldest boy did not make the move, he was not living in the home any longer, so I did not meet him. I met the girl, my sister, in passing, she was leaving with friends to go back to her recently left home for a visit. It was a very quick, too quick, introduction. Polite, explained well by her and L that she had plans to visit left friends, she had been busy when I arrived, and would not return until after I left.  The small talk made with her was very nice, she was very kind. I knew, then, it had to be at least weird to be meeting the illegitimate child of your mother.  Sister explained later that she had some issue with all the finding out of me, some sorting out to do.  I can only imagine.  The youngest, a boy was about 13, he was quiet, yet talkative when we spoke alone in the backyard. He had recently lost his dad, moved, his brother did not move with him, his grandmother was dying of cancer, and his mom just came up with another kid, I am surprised he was normal. My impression of him was he might be a bit geeky, if video games existed then he would have been a gamer. I loved talking with him, we talked about nothing and everything while the boys ran around in the backyard, his move, his new school, what he liked. He said he thought it was neat I found his mom. He figured it must have made her really sad to have not known about me all those years.

On first contact with L she explained she had not told her children of me. Her husband had advised her to tell them, as well as search for me, but she never could bring herself to do either. My finding her forced her to tell. Telling them was not as bad as she had anticipated, again one of those obvious God interventions.  A surprise for L was the response from the two older, #1 son said “ I wondered when you would tell us about her.” and daughter said “ I always thought there was another one.”  Sister told me later that as a young child #1 son would tell her that they had a big sister that would take care of them, kind of like an invisible friend.  She said he also would use this ‘big sister’ to scare her into doing whatever he wanted,also, saying the big sis would hurt her if she did not.  No wonder she had to work through things before she got to know me. #1 son does not know how he knew but he said he always knew there was another, a big sister. Did he sense it? Had he overheard his parents talking of me? No one knows.

Keith remembers eating dinner with them in their house, and Lee talking a lot, both boys entertaining, and keeping the mood light. I don’t remember the meal at all. I remember eating at Schlotsky’s and L and I both ordering turkey with mustard, and L noticing and saying how her family thinks it so weird not to eat turkey with mayonnaise. I remember getting in L’s car scooting across the seat, and finding a picture stuck in the crack. It was a black and white, of a girl sitting in the grass, hair in a headband, she looked just like me when I was in high school. I was showing it to Keith and L got in the car, asked where I found it, I explained and she said it probably fell out in the move, and tossed it on the dash. At the same time she said she did not like the way she looked in the picture, I told her it looked a lot like I did.   I wish I had that picture. I remember going to the antique/flea market with her, Keith does not.

I remember conversations with L.  I told L of my wonder over her not remembering my birthday, I explained my romantic fantasy of our thinking of each other then.  I remember us sitting in her kitchen when she explained that in order for her to survive, for her to live with herself she had to make herself forget for the last 24 years. I know today I feel guilt and sadness a sense of failure over not finding lost pets. I wonder on their feeling abandoned, if they died, were hurt, starved, if they are taken by others.  L felt that, and more, for a child, her child. She had to make her self not dwell on these things, she had a family other children who needed her to focus on them, to love them, and she did.

I felt I needed to thank L for giving me a better way, for sacrificing herself, for taking the harder road. Not that she did it for ME, she did not know me, I just happened to be the baby. I wanted to reassure her that I appreciated her, that I sympathized with her. I thanked L for not having an abortion,  and giving me for adoption. L’s answer is something I think all should hear, and know.

L said, she really did not deserve a great deal of thanks. She said she was a good person, she followed the rules,she was church going, she always did what was right, law abiding. Getting pregnant was not following the rules, having sex unwed, was a wrong choice. It would have been much easier to have an abortion and not endure the physical and emotional pain, to not shame the family, except at that time abortions were illegal. Had abortions been legal she would have had one. She had already broken the rules and became pregnant, breaking another and having an abortion would just make it worse. She said she did not want to hurt me, she was being honest. I was not hurt, I understood. So often, too often, we let man be what governs our decisions, define for us what is moral.  We justify our actions, our choices, even if they go against obedience to God, because our government says it is all ok.  I thank God abortions were not legal, then. I pray that abortions would go against all societies moral standards . I pray for  abortions to be illegal just as murder is. If abortion had been legal 48 years ago not only would I not exist, but 3 men and 6 children would not either.   How many lives have been lost,how many purposes destroyed by abortions?

Bio grandmother was an amazing woman. L is a product of her. L is an amazing woman. I am a product of her. I hope it is genetic.

 

Posted in Rants Raves

When NOT to text…or how to date the old-fashioned way!

Yes over and over again! Annie knows from whenst she speaks, types. If you have picked up the phone, found the number, call, speak, talk to the person! The new talk to text that Iphone does is ridiculous!! Seriously, you are talking in a phone to type to a person?

The Ultimate Late Bloomer

I can’t believe I’m about to wax poetic about the days of yore, but as a single gal out there dating, I’ve come across a phenomenon that is just not normal, people. Not one bit.I thought I was the only one that felt this, but thankfully after interviewing several women and men, I’ve found that what I thought was a lone pet peeve is actually a universal one.

What is this maddening, irritating tick, you ask? Okay, hold on to your boot straps folks, cause I’m about to upset techies everywhere.

It’s TEXTERS.

There I said it, and my load feels lighter for just typing it out. Text-iquette is something that is begging to be addressed as it is becoming more and more common in today’s dating world.

I get it – we are an A.D.D. society, used to getting information faster than a speeding bullet. Can’t remember who starred…

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